In January, I wrote about the need to be heard as a means of connection to Source, and then how making systems visible brings the Cool to life.   Both of these points touch on today’s topic—the need to be vulnerable. 

It’s not our natural impulse.  I remember when my German shepherd was old and arthritic, and her hips would just give out at times.  I had to literally walk the rows of my 2,000 trees to find her each time, because she would not bark or cry out—if you’re injured in nature, you don’t advertise your vulnerability!   But you also don’t get help.  

And that’s the reality of getting help—we first must be vulnerable.   We have to let the plumber into the messy basement to fix the pipes.   We have to show the accountant the disaster our records have become.  And the doctor makes you strip (!), and then prods you where it hurts. 

Vulnerability.  We have to admit that we aren’t in control after all, that we haven’t managed the situation well, and that we’re unable to proceed well without help.   In fact, that’s the Latin root of the word…it means literally “wounded-ability.”  

And there’s the problem for healing.  When we need it – we don’t ask for it.

One of my closest friends recently had a horrible bout of the flu.  Three weeks worth.   Borderline go to the hospital sick.   Now, she calls me periodically to ask for healing help for friends and family, and that has all gone swimmingly.  So why not this time, when it was so badly needed?  Simple.  She was vulnerable.  In bed, head pounding, trouble breathing, constant coughing, sheer exhaustion, too fatigued to get up vulnerable.   [Not to worry—I found out and brought not only healing but also healthy meals and supplies—including Kleenex!  All better now.]

OK, to be fair, the poor girl could barely get out of bed.  But you get my point.

Instead, we’re used to self-reliance.  We deal with it.   Or so we think. 

But we don’t deal with it.  It isn’t handled, at all.  It’s just tolerated…so it continues.   We just get used to it, and tell ourselves a story for the benefit of our ego.   Western culture especially enshrines independence.   Do it yourself.  

How is that working out?  Self-help books sell billions each year.   And most of them…are never read. 

So what turns us to ask for help?

A crisis.   Reality finally forces itself upon us.   The pipes burst.  The taxes are due.  The pain becomes debilitating (or at least distracting enough or nagging enough to want it to stop).   Why do miracles come at the last possible second?  Until then, our egos are still hoping to turn it around without help.

But we don’t have to employ crisis management.  We aren’t creatures stranded in the wild. 

Each of us is inherently vulnerable.  We have limits.  Our health, our abilities, our available and time and resources—reality is, we can’t do it alone.

Recognizing and embracing vulnerability is what opens us to change, to new possibilities, to a new life, full of what we previously were lacking.  It’s the first step.  And it’s a crucial for success.  

Like baby birds, we have to open our mouths if we want to be fed.    Eventually—they will learn to fly.